for friday: a window inside my head (bonus: Jake!)

I don’t know what is wrong with me today (maybe it is because it is the 13th, or something), but I really am so bored and scatterbrained, that I cannot think of any coherent and meaningful thing to write about. So I’ll hit you with a random sampling of things that I have been thinking about today:

– I really want a new job. Maybe I should be an interior designer. No, seriously. (There are times that I actually do have to try and convince myself that something is a good idea. Sometimes, this is not easy.)
– Why can’t I win the lottery; then I wouldn’t have to worry about that job thing? Then, I could just hang out all day. And drive a Mercedes. Oh yeah… a Mercedes. (I love my car, but I do find myself thinking about Mercedes Benzes a lot. Perhaps I was a rapper in another life.)
– I hate the crap on TV and in the movies. I know that I have a thousand stories that are just as good. Why don’t I write them up already?! (This is more of me trying to convince myself to do something. But I am also good at convincing myself to procrastinate, so let’s see who wins the cock fight.)

– Whew, that last thought made me tired. I need to rest. (Apparently, procrastination is a dominant cock.)
– There is so much to do before tonight; people are coming over. I hope they like me. I hope they like our house. I hope they don’t fall through the floor. (Gatherings are fun. As long as they don’t involve Magic: the Gathering. And I do still worry about the floor; at least it wouldn’t be a long fall.)
– I got paid today, but I don’t want to balance my checkbook. Because then it will take away the pay that I received, and make feel just as broke as I did yesterday. (Bills suck. Not having money sucks. Capitalism sucks. Whoa there, I almost said something meaningful… sorry about that.)
– Pick up lottery tickets on the way home. (Just a dollar, and they support education; what’s not to love? I think that I should start getting them in rural Georgia, the people that live in trailers are the only ones that ever win.)
– Pick up beer on the way home, so as not to think about debt and lack of money. (Drunk = happy. That is not a form of coping, so much as a form of happiness. Beer = good. Now let’s drink!)
– If I win the lottery, I can pick up beer in my new Mercedes. (More on the Mercedes. This time, I imagine the color I would get… silver.)
– I need to stop watching Miami Ink. I want a new tattoo. I want several new tattoos. Those cost money though… and I would have to go through the healing process. (I LOVE tattoos. I want them, but then I talk myself out of it. I just need to go in there and get another one. I kind of want a semi-big one… exciting!)
– I should make an appointment to get a new tattoo, I want one! (Now, I am really thinking about it. Premeditated tattooing; I would get what, 15-life?)
– If I won the lottery, I could drive over in my Mercedes to the tattoo place, and pay with all my new money. (I might as well get the Mercedes logo tattooed “on my backside”. Sudden urge to watch ‘Mommie Dearest’.)
– If I got a new hot tattoo, and had the Mercedes, and all the cash, the chances of me meeting Jake Gyllenhaal have to increase. (You know Jake thinks tattoos are hot. I think Jake is hot. Balance the equation, if you dare.)
– Get lots of lottery tickets on the way home. (More money, more problems my ass, Biggie!)

Oh yeah, and as promised, a Jake pic for collective “oohing” and “ahhhing”; but no swooning. I am the only one allowed to swoon today. Isn’t that one lucky bitch? Damn. [photo from iheartjakemedia.com]

That is kind of how my day has been… just a train of random thoughts about different things. I sense that an underlying theme is money, but that may be because a good friend of mine just had a $500 per month increase in his mortgage. What did you just say? $500 increase? I don’t even know what we would do if that happened to us; so here’s hoping that it doesn’t. Sorry Byron! Maybe I should get him some lottery tickets too.

The worst part about all this thinking about the lottery, is that I am so distracted and bored, that chances are, I will forget to even get the tickets in the first place. Maybe I should write it on my hand…

Seriously folks, that’s all I have. It looks like not to many other people are posting on their blogs today, anyway, so I guess I don’t feel so bad for not “bringing it”. Perhaps, I will “bring it” tomorrow; after all, people are coming over, and I am bound to get drunk and say at least one stupid thing. Here’s hoping I can remember long enough to blog it.

Alright, I am putting an end to this right now. (I have got talent for writing about nothing though, you gotta admit!)