On Bush’s Little Things, which hails from their debut album Sixteen Stone (which came out when I was in high school… many mooons ago!), Gavin Rossdale sings, “it’s the little things that kill, tearing at my brain[s] again”. Sometimes, I feel like that song lyric really applies to me, because I do just that more often than I would like; I tend to let the little things get to me, and tear at my brain, bringing me down.
I think I am a pretty easy-going person for the most part, but there are a lot of times when it’s the little things that kill, and get me worked up, and it’s hard to come back down. This occus in more aspects of my life than I would like, but I’ve always been like this, for as long as I can recall.
Today, on my mind, I specifically refer to work for instance; when I am seeing a patient who has (from my perspective) a lack of a discernible stake in their own health care, it really bothers me. It always did when I was a nurse, and it continues to do so now that I am a nurse practitioner. It frustrates me when patients with serious medical conditions have a seemingly lackadaisical attitude about compliance and management of their illness. Sure, I get it, life happens, and I get that you are “busy and cannot come in so often”, but you have a serious chronic condition that if left unchecked, can literally be the death of you. Surely that responsibility is impressed upon most, right? I like to think that it is, but there are many patients that don’t seem bothered by the fact that they ran out of medication weeks ago, and never thought to call the office and see if we could help them in any way. Perhaps it is, in some part, a coping mechanism, fear, or simply ignorance, but when it is a patient that I have seen multiple times, it really tears at my brain how they just don’t seem to have a care in the world, and this “little thing” doesn’t seem like anything important to them. Then, when I am seeing them for their appointment, I get frustrated, and start lecturing them about possible side effects, complications, and all of that, and they just look at me like I’m being mean to them. Then, I get more frustrated. I get that old adage of you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink; but that means being really angry at the horse sometimes.
I know it is my job to educate, and I have learned in the past year of providing care for multiple patients daily, that I will, and continue to, encounter tons of patients that have real medical issues that they don’t want to, or refuse to take ownership of, and deal with, but it really bugs me, because I sincerely want the best for every patient I care for, and their lack of ownership and action on their own behalf stands in the way of that many, many times.
It continues to frustrate me, and while these are little things, and should be more of slight annoyances and things I should just let go, sometimes, I really brings me down, and can make my day less than a happy one. I hope that through my career I learn how to better walk the line between over-caring and complete ambivalence, because the gray area between the two can make even the most compassionate and patient person very frustrated to say the least. Anyone else work in health care feel this same way? I’d be surprised if I’m the only one, because this job can be very trying at times.
Here’s to going forward and trying to not let the little things kill; and hopefully not ruin my day, either.

Whoa. This song is a huge, fantastic SURPRISE!!! It has all of the energy and spunk that I love in groups like Paramore; in fact, the blazing guitar riffs, and the high range of the singer borrow a lot from that sound that I love so much. With this song, this “little Irish girl” is showing us that acts like Kelly Clarkson may have to step up their game, because they are no longer alone in this music scene. If there is any justice in this world, this song is going to be HUGE!!!! I love it and I can’t wait to see what Lesley has in store for us next. I have seen some buzz about her on the internets (specifically over at arjan writes), and all of the buzz seems to be the same; this chick is hot! Here’s hoping her album comes out soon, and we get to see what she’s all about! I like what I’ve heard on her myspace, so if that is any indicator, I can tell you I am definitely looking forward to more from Ms. Roy.
I briefly mentioned Alanis’ new album, Flavors of Entanglement last week; however, it was before I was able to truly absorb the record. I was (kind of) surprised to find a really decent effort from Alanis, not because I didn’t think she had it in her, but because of how different and ever changing her music has been in the past. Listening to Flavors, she has reminded me of why I liked her so much in the past; she has some great songs in her catalog, and with this record, she only adds to that list. This, so far, is my favorite song on the record. I love the softness of the song, and how her voice is so beautiful on it. I also love the lyrics. I am glad that Alanis is back! (Although, did she really go anywhere?!?!)
I can’t believe I am FINALLY featuring this song (I’ve been meaning to, but it kept getting pushed off of the list)! After seeing Rachael open for Sara Bareilles a couple of months ago, I have been absolutely smitten with this track, which in my opinion, is her most beautiful, honest, and touching. While some of her other stuff is a bit heavier than I like, this song is so light and beautiful, that you can’t help but love it. Rachael has some new material out now on an EP, and has a new album coming out this year. I can’t wait to hear it, because I really loved her in concert, and I like this album as well. This is one of those acts that not a lot of people know about, and when you hear them, you wonder why, because the talent is so clearly obvious.