Tag: equality

1969-2019: 50 years of Pride

50 years of Pride… and it all started with a riot.

Thanks to queer women and men, transgender women and drag queens, we can now celebrate who we are, who we love, and can do so openly because they started the fight. That is what Pride really, and truly means. We are proud and can celebrate openly because they stood up and started the fight.

On June 28, 1969, the cops came to the Stonewall to shut down a known gay establishment, and shit hit the fan; activists like Marsha P Johnson and Sylvia Rivera resisted, and the gay rights movement began.

It’s hard to believe that it has only been 50 years ago that a gay rights movement started, and to think; it has only been 4 years since we were granted gay marriage rights nationwide.

This shows that we have come a long way, but the current political climate indicates we have a long way to go to full acceptance and equality.
Today, I want to acknowledge those that came before me, threw the first punches, and stood up and said, I will not be punished, silenced, or mistreated because of who I love, and who I am.

Thank you Marsha P, Sylvia, and the rest of those that stood up for my rights; I salute you as pioneers of the gay rights movement, and I appreciate your hard work and sacrifices.

THAT is truly something to be proud of!

Tom Ford on gay marriage

This morning, I read this interview with Tom Ford, and I really liked some of the things he had to say; especially what he said about the gay marriage issue in this country. Tom Ford is my number one celebrity crush, so of course, any time I have a sliver of a good reason to do a post about him, I will. In fact, thinking about that, I don’t post about him nearly enough!

In the article, when he was asked if he would marry his partner of over 20 years, after being together for so long, Ford responded with:

Yes, when it becomes a federal law. Right now it doesn’t do any good in the states. A few weeks ago Richard had to go into the hospital for something, and I had to carry around all these legal documents saying I could make medical decisions for him. It was insane. The fact that we are not married in the federal sense means that if I were to die, he’d have to pay all these taxes on my estate and receive but a fraction of it and he’d have to alter his life —whereas if we were married, he wouldn’t have to face that burden. That’s disgusting. It’s wrong. But that said, I think I am in favor of terming what I’m talking about as a civil partnership. We all get so caught up with this word marriage. For me, the word marriage is something that a religion should decide. Just give me all the same rights. A civil partnership is what I’d like for everyone—heterosexual as well as homosexual. Call it what you like—it’s the rights that are important. Getting hung up with the semantics derails the cause we’re all fighting for.

It really resonated with me, because that is exactly the way that people should view it. If the word marriage makes it such a sticky and religious issue, take “marriage” out of it. Give us the rights, you can keep the religious mumbo jumbo; we don’t want that part of it anyway. Additionally, the government shouldn’t back religious practices anyway, so if this will get us equal rights, I am all for it.

I for one, am sick and tired of someone holding up a book and determining what rights I get to have because of what that book may or may not have told them to believe as the truth; the same book that also told them to love thy neighbor, and not pass judgment. Wrapping civil rights up in religious institutions is not only wrong, it is unconstitutional. When will our government take a stand, and stand up for us?

a lot of little things really add up

I just took a survey in order for $20 credit added to my account for a website I bought a product from. To be quite honest, I was sort of offended that I was not given any option other than single, married, widowed, divorced, or separated in the relationship question field. Since none of those apply to me, I left that question blank, but the survey wouldn’t submit without it, so I had to chose an incorrect response.

I know it may seem “meager” or “nit-picky” but it’s honestly little things like this that constantly reaffirm the second class status of gay people. I ended up emailing them, because sometimes, it really is simple ignorance, and I was hoping that was the case in this instance. Here was the email I sent:

I just took the survey on your website after committing to buy one of your products, and I find it interesting that you don’t offer an option for same sex couples. Clearly, we cannot get married in most parts of the US, as well as most of the world, and I am slightly offended that I was required to answer the question as a part of your survey; because I am neither single, NOR married. Granted, I didn’t have to take the survey, but since I did, I felt compelled to drop you a line to let you know that a simple inclusion field for partnered/in a relationship would clear this whole thing right up; that, or not requiring that I answer the question with an incorrect answer. Thanks, Duane Moody

They replied with:

Hi Duane,
You are absolutely correct. We need to fix this survey right away – and we will do so as soon as possible.

Like I said, this may be incredibly minor, but when you take a bunch of minor things (as well as some major ones) they start to really add up after a while, and every new one is just a reminder of every other one before it. I can now cross this one off the list, and appreciate the fact that they responded quickly and kindly. I am sure that a lot of people see it as complaining, and sweating the small stuff, but I see it as all part of the bigger picture. We have to be recognized as equal; not just considered later when we bring it up that we were excluded.

This is not really a “little thing”, but there was a raid on the Eagle last night, that reeks of Stonewall-esque civil rights infringement, and it really brings home the point that I am trying to make about our struggle being FAR from over. Some thoughts about the Eagle raid: while they may have gone in on suspicion of “seedy” behavior, and they may have been well within their rights to shut things down for not having the proper permit, from the sound of it, they had a very heavy hand in doing so. I know that if I would have been there, legally drinking in a bar, one that holds a legal liquor license, and would have been handcuffed OR searched, without explanation, I would have been outraged. Even though I wasn’t there, I can’t help but read this, feel as though The Eagle and its patrons were being targeted because it was a gay establishment. I don’t like to think those things, but the description (especially the recall of one person who was there) of the event, makes almost impossible not to.

Honestly, if it is what it sounds like it is, it is really unbelievable that it happened; not only in Atlanta, but in 2009. I, for one, would like to know why the cops aren’t out there working on stopping the violent crimes that have been escalating over the past couple of years; instead of raiding gay bars? If we have such a “shortage” of funds and police force, why are they focusing on the lack of a permit for dancers in a gay bar, instead of bigger, more dangerous stuff? Couldn’t they have issued some kind of warning, or citation that would certainly wouldn’t necessitate a raid? Again, the more I look at this situation, the more it reeks of discriminatory action. I’m interested to see how this Eagle raid story develops, and I hope that it doesn’t fall squarely on the ever-growing list of acts discrimination against gay people in this country; because whether the items are big or small, it’s a really long list.

um, thanks… FOR NOTHING

It seems that my outrage yesterday was a little less than it should have been. Turns out, the gesture Obama tried to placate us with, was worth nothing:

The memorandum Obama signed Wednesday is not expected to grant health and retirement benefits to same-sex partners, as that is prohibited under the Defense of Marriage Act.

(source)

That’s right, fellow gays and lesbians, say it with me; we are STILL:
SECOND.
CLASS.
CITIZENS.

…and it doesn’t look like that is going to change any time soon.

This is not just disappointing, it is outrageous. This is a major slap in the face, Mr. President, and it will not be ignored. What was initially seen as a cop out, is now an empty promise worth practically nothing. Sure, I know you are limited by DOMA, but this empty gesture is not good enough, and frankly it is insulting that you would think that it is worth anything at all.

Perhaps I am being too harsh though… as you do care, right? Allow me the chance to give you the benefit of the doubt; you did say,

“I believe it’s discriminatory. I think it interferes with state’s rights, and we will work with Congress to overturn it.”

(source)

So when can we expect this to happen? If you really want to do something for gays and lesbians, DO SOMETHING. Instead of handing us empty promises, why not take actions that would actually matter? If striking down DOMA is what it will take, why didn’t you propose legislation to do just that; instead of handing us this bullshit?! Saying that you are against something while doing absolutely nothing to stop it, implicates you as a willing accomplice. Mr. President, you are guilty of standing by while we are again, discriminated against, publicly, by our government. It is going to take more than a strongly emphatic “opposition” (with a current obvious lack of any sign that you will actually do more than “be against it”) to make a difference, and I for one am waiting to see if you will actually do anything you continue to promise. The problem is, I am losing my patience.

Again, Mr. President, I am outraged at the sheer lack of support for the community that supported you so ferociously during your rise to power; only to be ushered to the back of the bus once you took the podium. For shame, Mr. President, for shame. I only hope that you will bring the change that you promised, and stop trying to sell us snake oil instead. This is one member of the gay community that is rapidly losing support for the great man that I thought you were.

alright, my candidate for president is…

Ha! I got you!

Just kidding… I said it was too early to “back a candidate”, and I couldn’t agree more, but I have to say, I can’t get over the optimism that I constantly and consistently see from Dennis Kucinich. I think that he has lofty goals, and falls on the side of extreme optimism when it comes to many of the issues; but that is why I like him so much. I would like to believe, as he does, that things REALLY can be good without all of the evil that we currently see. I would really like to believe that there is more to people than power and greed.

I mean, can you imagine having a president that actually cares about poverty; that is, ENDING it, and not creating it (like our current “leader”)? He’s got the right idea about the “gay agenda” too (the only one to be for gay marriage; which again, isn’t the issue, but nevertheless, we know where stands); equal rights for one and all. I just can’t help but think, that it could be a truly great society if we were all as optimistic, and really believed and strove for that which could make us the best society that we really could be. What would be so bad about having a nation of people that were all doing well, and thriving? That sounds like a good thing to me!

While I am going to stick to my “it’s too early” principle, and I am not going to say that I “back” him officially; I do hope in my heart that a man that believes that peace and equality are two fundamental principles for this world’s survival can have such an influential position someday. Maybe Dennis is that man? I for one think that would be pretty awesome.

All that, and his wife is hot! (Not to mention, really smart, and quite the optimistic sharer of great ideas).

Go Kucinich! (And those like him)!

executing homosexuals doesn’t bother us… so long as it happens elsewhere

This has me upset, outraged, and disturbed.

Less than 24 hours ago, atlmalcontent professed an agreement with my position on gay marriage as an issue, and it is the issue that has gotten me so upset, that brings us to agreement again; in a big way. There is a boy about to be executed for alleged homosexual acts in Iran, and there is an almost chilling silence (or worse (??), only a simple passing mention — which I admit, is at least SOMETHING), coming from the gay rights organizations and gay mouthpieces of the world. How is this possible? I thought that our gay rights organizations like the HRC stood for equalizing and gaining HUMAN rights for gays and lesbians everywhere? Perhaps it is more accurate then, to say that they are focused more on gaining rights for gays and lesbians here in America only? I wish it weren’t the case, but one can only surmise that the apparent silence with regards to this boy’s pending execution, definitely suggests that this is a more accurate mission statement. So I wonder, why aren’t we fighting for every gay and lesbian person in the world; or for that matter, the freedom and equality of everyone? I know that it is important that we focus energy on finding equality for ourselves, but it is clear that we need to widen our focus, because acts against any homosexual as awful as this, are acts against all of us — because it could BE any of us.

Instantly, when I heard about this case, I was reminded of when those two boys were executed in Iran for the very same thing a while back, and how they were very publicly hanged for their “crimes”. That image is still burned in my mind, and thinking of it turns my stomach to knots, and brings tears to my eyes. In addition to that memory, to think that someone was/is going to be hanged for doing something that I take for granted is indeed scarily humbling and intensely frightening. What’s worse, in my mind, is to think that we don’t seem very concerned about the fact that it is happening again. Why aren’t we all up in arms about this case, as we supposedly were before (because really, what was done about it last time?)? Could it be, that we are waiting for the kid to be swinging from the rafters before we give it a passing glance? WTF? Why aren’t the human rights organizations outraged, and calling for action from the government? Those questions are burning me up inside, and because of a lack of attention, I can have no answers.

Even more, part of me shudders to think that it could (at least in some small part) be because the boy is Iranian, and we are currently being drilled by our government to believe that Iranians are our enemies, linking the boy with our concept of an enemy (and therefore, lack of care if he dies(?)). I really hope that isn’t so, but it is swimming in my mind nonetheless. The lack of any concern has me reeling, and looking for any answers, to be quite honest.

The point here is this: there is an awful crime that has happened before about to happen again; and it should not go unchecked. The Iranian government should not be able to commit such heinous acts of violence against anyone, and someone should say something, and at a bare minimum, focus some attention on this situation. This represents the very problem with only focusing on “some” civil liberties in “some” places for “some” people; if you go somewhere else, in the world where you are not protected (or worse, for those that have no choice but to be born gay in those places), and it means that you have done nothing to help the global cause of equality for all gays all over the world. Being safe in America, and able to marry, does not protect gays in other parts of the world; and that is something that should concern us. We should care that gays and lesbians in other countries are KILLED for what we take for granted.

I for one am hoping that something is done, and this CHILD does not have to die. I hope that our gay rights organizations speak up, and show some consideration for what this child is going through; because it could just as easily be one of our own… but again, the fact is, that he IS one of our own. This boy’s struggle for life should really shake us to the core, and make us realize how good we have it here; and challenge us to make it better everywhere… but for whatever reason, it isn’t, and that really bothers me.

Please, do what this post is doing, and direct as much attention as you can to this situation. I heard about this from atlmalcontent, and by voicing our outrage, we are forcing this to be discussed. If one person tells someone else, this can go somewhere; I believe that. Attention to heinous acts of violence like this, can hopefully make changes happen; and it is clear that we are the ones who shine the light on it. Please, don’t remain silent.

My heart goes out to this boy and his family. I can only hope that he is saved. This is a dark, dark day for gay rights worldwide; unfortunately, it has happened before, and will probably happen again. What will it take for us to stand up and unite?

why is gay marriage an issue?

I keep hearing all of this stuff about trying to find each presidential candidate’s position on gay marriage, and I have ask… why is gay marriage an issue that should be the concern of a president? Seriously? The issue is not gay marriage; it is civil rights. Marriage is the word that the use to describe the religious procedure of getting bound to another person for life. The only thing that could make it an issue, is that it is currently recognized by the government as a legal union, and there are privileges that come with its status. However, it is not the issue, and I don’t get why we are so concerned with that word; marriage.

I would happily take a civil union any day; so long as it afforded me EQUAL rights. I don’t give two shits about calling my partnership a “marriage” vs. calling it a “civil union”; so long as we are treated equally under the law of our government. I personally think that should be more of the focus, as this issue will always be used as more of a wedge than anything, and no person in their right mind is going to go up against the juggernaut that is the Christian church. Also, isn’t there supposed to be a separation of church and state? So again, why not stop calling it “gay marriage” as an issue?

I think that if you get married, good for you; you should also have to file for a civil union, which should be the only union the government officially recognizes. Make it standard for everyone, and make it available for gays and lesbians as well. Keep marriage in the churches, take religion out of the equation, and things can be more acceptable for everyone, right? Perhaps this is too simple of a concept, but it boggles my mind that gay marriage is all anyone ever asks about when it comes to gay and lesbian rights and a presidential candidate. (what about gay civil rights of other people throughout the world? I think that should be a huge concern of ours as well; but that is a more lengthy conversation).

I realized this more fully when I was reading what Obama said, and the “reaction” from some of the gays that he was against gay marriage. We don’t need to fight for religious justification; we need to fight for equality. Sure, the fight for gay marriage is a fight for equality, but it isn’t necessarily the same thing; take religious practice out of the picture officially. These church driven people are NEVER going to give us the “right” to take their “sacred” practice (now with a 50+% failure-rate!) for ourselves, so we should just drop the shit already. I am tired of continually giving it back to them so they can wedge it between what’s really important and this dance that we have been stuck in forever. I am for equality; nothing less, nothing more. Doesn’t that sound like a more fruitful fight?

Unrelated link: This is quite fascinating if it is true; apparently, the first AIDS case was in 1969 in the US. This makes me wonder; why didn’t it spread to the epic proportions that it has today? What was the factor that caused it to spread so rapidly in the 1980s that was different 11 years earlier? If this man was the first documented case of AIDS, how many people had it before him; and who infected him? It really turns the notion of epidemiology on its head, because it really did occur in a seemingly singular incident. Weird.