Tag: bullying

listen up!, near and dear, that is so gay, tragic, wtf?!

another, this time local, victim of hate

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This completely breaks my heart: 11 year old boy named Jaheem Herrera, commits suicide to escape bullying and taunting from fellow classmates (h/t to my friend Joey who posted the link earlier this afternoon).

I don’t know if anyone even read the piece that I wrote last week about this EXACT thing happening to another 11 year old boy, Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, but I will not let this go silently either.

This is sickening. This is outrageous. This is infuriating. This specifically made my already upset stomach turn: Jaheem’s mother, concerned, had talked to Jaheem’s best friend the prior week, who said,

Yes ma’am. He told me that he’s tired of everybody always messing with him in school. He is tired of telling the teachers and the staff, and they never do anything about the problems. So, the only way out is by killing himself.

I’ll say it again; DO SOMETHING if you see this happening. You CAN stop your children from being bigots. EVERYONE must stop the “playful” use of faggot and gay as derogatory terms; it isn’t a joke. ANOTHER 11 year old child is dead because people take this issue so flippantly. Taunting and teasing is not just “kids being kids”, and EVERY time this happens, it adds to the problem.

Our society of “subversive” hate and the fervent anti-homosexuality campaign in this country must stop. This should be a country were an 11 year old child can go to school without fear of being taunted, teased, and bullied to the point that the only way he feels he can escape is to kill himself. It just isn’t right, and I can’t believe that less than a week after writing about a horrible case of this happening, it shows up again, practically at my doorstep.

My heart goes out to Jaheem’s family. Jaheem, I am so sorry for what they put you through, and I am even more sorry that no one with the power to stop them stood up for you. They should be thoroughly ashamed.

Clearly, there is a major problem with anti-gay sentiment and outright hatred for gays in this country. I have to wonder how many children we need to lose before we start doing something about it? Sadly, many have gone before Carl and Jaheem, and many more will go before the judgment and hatred subside. What’s the WORST, is that it doesn’t even matter if these two boys were gay or not; their peers used the hatred and disgust behind words like ‘faggot’ to hurt them so badly, that they couldn’t take it anymore. It disgusts me that people continue to let this happen around them.

A final thought: I will never understand how the very people that stand there, pointing their fingers in our faces, saying that they are morally superior, pass the judgment that causes things like this to happen. Shame on you all. Your “feelings” about homosexuality are far more dangerous than homosexuality itself could ever be.

civil rights, near and dear, that is so gay

a concrete example of how the anti-gay movement in this country is so dangerous

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“Hey Faggot”.
“You are such a little pussy”.
“Look, he’s not even a boy, he’s definitely a sissy little girl”.
“You’re gay”.

These are all phrases that I despise hearing, but I heard them, and several other colorful variations, MANY times all throughout my 12 years of public school. There were many times I would come home and just be so upset that I couldn’t even speak to anyone, because of the taunts that I received pretty much every day from other students. I dared not tell my parents, because of how embarrassed I felt that I was continually labeled in this way; I honestly didn’t want this seemingly horrible thing to be true about me. As I look back, I honestly don’t know how I made it, but I did. However, I did not escape completely unscathed. The damage was done, and I didn’t come out until I was 22; all because I feared being the very thing that I was accused of, and was convinced was so bad when I was younger because of the taunting and teasing that I received. I consider myself one of the lucky ones, because despite it all, I did make it, and it has, in part, made me who I am today.

My point in writing this is not to preach or even elicit sympathy; as I said, I am a grown man who made it through that hell and I am stronger for it. However, there are thousands of kids out there that are going through this same torture right now, and unfortunately, a bunch of them won’t make it. The torture of being taunted and teased by your peers day in and day out is enough for many gay (as well as kids that aren’t even gay, but are just different, and therefore labeled as such) kids to desire so strongly to escape that hell that they take their own lives.

Recently, this very thing tragically happened to Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover. He was taunted and teased, and in order to escape it, he only saw suicide as his way out. Suicide rates amongst gay youth is staggeringly high, and I honestly believe that if our society wasn’t so dismissive of the hateful way in which we are treated, it could be significantly lowered. Carl didn’t have to die in vain; we can change. We can teach our children that hate and bullying is extremely harmful, and that by doing so, you are emotionally scarring someone. Teachers and administrators can also take a huge role in this change by suppressing this behavior as it is seen and reported; unfortunately in this case, Carl’s mother complained to the school and no action was taken.

I am extremely saddened, and I feel horrible for Carl’s entire family. This young boy should not have had to endure the torture that he did, and no other child should have to endure it either. If you or someone you know is close-minded about homosexuality, and perpetuates any level of the hatred and bigotry that this form of torture stems from, tell them about Carl, and how he was an innocent 11 year old boy who was taken from this world far too soon. Tell them that the very hate that they feel inside themselves for homosexuals, or homosexuality, is what drove Carl to take his own life. The time for this mindset is over, and it has got to change.

Perhaps if we all stopped being so hateful with one another, and stopped pointing fingers and judging those around us, less kids will feel like they have to end it all to escape the torture. I for one, hope that with gay rights laws passing in many states recently, and the potential for it to continue to gain momentum ensues, that we will hopefully grow as a society, and stories like this can be a thing of the past. Carl deserves that, and nothing less. We all do. I’m so sorry Carl.