Author: duane

cover it… or don’t?

First of all, dang! It has been more than a year since I have posted. I guess life is really preoccupied with other things, and there isn’t much time for the introspective blogger to pour out nonsensical musings on the daily anymore… at least not for this one. That being said, I have been thinking about this for a bit, and I wanted to sound off about it; cover songs.

Sometimes, a cover song is golden. Sometimes, it is the one you recognize, and it is the one that many people think of when you think of a particular song. Is it better than the original? Maybe! Is the cover more popular? Probably! Some notable examples include Whitney Houston’s cover of Dolly Parton’s I Will Always Love You, Aretha Franklin’s cover of Otis Redding’s Respect, and how could you forget Tina Turner’s cover of Creedence Clearwater Revival’s Proud Mary? I could go on and on, and some of these songs have become the “standard” version that you think of when you think of a particular song. Other notable contemporary examples, include Natalie Imbruliga’s cover of Ednaswap’s Torn and Mark Ronson and Amy Winehouse’s cover of Zuton’s Valerie; I honestly can’t say as I really “knew” the original, but instantly recognize the cover. Is that to say that the cover is better? Maybe (I have listed some GREAT covers)! That leads to my point in bringing this up… sometimes, it’s best NOT to cover a song.

As an artist, I feel like you need to ask yourself; can I do the song justice? Can I do it as good as or better than the original? Is my version just a fun little love song to the original, and will people really love it as much as I do? I feel like sometimes, the cover is probably just a fun little, “I love this song, and I can sing, so why not?”, and it really shows. Enter the “bad” cover song. Some times, you shouldn’t cover a song, just because you could, because to the listener, you really didn’t do it any justice, and nothing new or wonderful was brought to the table. Sometimes, the result is cringe-worthy. If you are a cover band, and it is fun show, then have at it; but if it is going on a record, or being released a single, I wonder what the motivation is to do (what I think is) a poor cover of a song.

I have a few examples:

Colbie Caillat’s cover of Roberta Flack’s Killing Me Softly With His Song. Now this is actually a cover of a cover, as far as I’m concerned, because most people think of the Fugees version when they think of this song. Not to pick on Colbie too much, but there is literally zero soul in this cover. It isn’t necessary, and I hear it more often than I should. This is a great example of how not to do a good cover.
Another prime example is Paris Hilton’s cover of Rod Stewart’s Do You Think I’m Sexy. The answer is a firm no on that one. There is nothing sexy about this cover, at all. One final of my least favorites, that was/is played TO DEATH on the radio not that long ago, is Ritt Momney’s cover of Corinne Bailey Rae’s Put Your Records On, which shows that sometimes, covering a song does nothing but take a good song, and make it really bad. This is a record that I do NOT want you to put on. It’s almost like they tried to do a half-assed, out-of-tune cover to make fun of the song, but I don’t know if there truly is irony or sarcasm here, or an attempt at something good; it’s difficult to tell. Either way, it is definitely one to skip.

Now, I know I am saying a lot as someone who cannot sing for themselves, so this is all a matter of opinion. There are tons of great songs out there, and cover them all you want; just do it justice! Add a little something, make it yours, give it life (think John Mayer’s live cover of Tom Petty’s Free Fallin’; THAT is a phenomenal cover)! Don’t just go through the motions, or make something that is just a filler track for your record. Again, just my two cents, but these bad covers made me think; what other covers are there that you can’t stand to hear? Sound off in the comments!

who is fancy?

Remember this song?

Well, I, for one, was kind of obsessed with it, and well, who Fancy was; I mean, this person can sing! Not long after it was released, he was revealed on Late Night with Jimmy Fallow, singing the song live, and it turns out, he is a queer artist, named Jake “Fancy” Hagood.

Interestingly enough, I recognized him in the crowd at a Troye Sivan concert a few years ago, and went over to talk with him. He was super sweet, and I asked him about upcoming music (because I loved Goodbye, as well as his song he did with Meghan Trainor and Ariana Grande, Boys Like You), and he said he was working on it (queue excitement!). After several years of waiting, and a few (amazing) single releases here and there, he announced that he was releasing his long awaited debut album, Southern Curiosity. Well, since it came out last month, I have been listening to it on repeat, and I can say that Fancy has released arguably one of the strongest albums of the year thus far.

Check it out:

You know how they say good things come to those that wait? Well, it was a long while, but Fancy has really delivered on his soulful and heartfelt debut. This album should be soaring up the charts, but sadly, it is probably being overlooked by a lot of people just due to lack of exposure. Well, that’s one reason for this post; give it a listen! You won’t be sorry. I love supporting queer artists, being queer myself, but that’s not the only reason to give him a listen; he is the real deal, and is super talented, which is reflected on this flawless debut.

Now… for a vinyl release; that would be the cherry on top! This one is DEFINITELY going to be in my top albums of the year for 2021!!

Stand out tracks: The Answer, Good Man, Forest, Love Again, Either, Southern Curiosity.

favorite albums of 2020

So, I have really been neglecting this blog, but really, I don’t have any excuses. Life is pretty crazy, and times aren’t like they were, BUT! Work is good, albeit sometimes stressful, and takes up a lot of my time. Life is good, but can also be stressful, and takes up the rest of my time.

That being said, I wanted to share some of my favorite albums from this year, as there were quite a few stellar albums released (I also included the songs from the cancelled Eurovision this year; there were some AMAZING entries, and it is sadly, another thing that covid-19 ruined). Here’s a playlist for you; play them in order or mix is up, it’s up to you! I know 2020 has been a crazy year for everyone, so here’s hoping next year is a little less traumatic!

(Note: The playlist is a lot longer than it appears… make sure you check out the full one on Spotify!)

I might make a playlist of my favorite songs, and if so, I will plan on another, rare post! Til then (hopefully)!!

Happy holidays, and happy new year everybody!

The Americans

We were a little late to get to it, but James and I recently decided to watch The Americans, which was show on FX, starring Keri Russell and Matthew Rhys, and followed a pair of Russian spies posing as “regular Americans”. We have been binge watching the seasons on Amazon Prime, and just finished last night. The series finale was great, and it was honestly a great show.

Since the show has been off the air for a bit, I figured there were some thoughts about the finale, which we watched last night, and I found this article about the finale. I’m glad I read it, because it leaves you with some questions, and I wanted to see if others felt the same catharsis that I did with the way they wrapped it up. BONUS (and perhaps the coolest part, that I was completely unaware of): I discovered that the show was based on a true story!! Mind blown!!

The article about the real spies is super interesting, especially if you are/were fans of the show; and it is crazy to think that stuff like this is real, and that the Russians did have spies (maybe still do?!?!?!!), living and posing as “regular” Americans. It’s like a spy novel come to life. Wild. As for the show, if you haven’t seen it, do yourself a favor, it’s great, and it’s free on Amazon Prime!

1969-2019: 50 years of Pride

50 years of Pride… and it all started with a riot.

Thanks to queer women and men, transgender women and drag queens, we can now celebrate who we are, who we love, and can do so openly because they started the fight. That is what Pride really, and truly means. We are proud and can celebrate openly because they stood up and started the fight.

On June 28, 1969, the cops came to the Stonewall to shut down a known gay establishment, and shit hit the fan; activists like Marsha P Johnson and Sylvia Rivera resisted, and the gay rights movement began.

It’s hard to believe that it has only been 50 years ago that a gay rights movement started, and to think; it has only been 4 years since we were granted gay marriage rights nationwide.

This shows that we have come a long way, but the current political climate indicates we have a long way to go to full acceptance and equality.
Today, I want to acknowledge those that came before me, threw the first punches, and stood up and said, I will not be punished, silenced, or mistreated because of who I love, and who I am.

Thank you Marsha P, Sylvia, and the rest of those that stood up for my rights; I salute you as pioneers of the gay rights movement, and I appreciate your hard work and sacrifices.

THAT is truly something to be proud of!

something something music

So I clearly don’t use this blog very often.

Does anyone still read or care? Who knows…

Regardless, I work a lot, and am distracted by life, which seems to go by faster each day. I still enjoy listening to music, and have been recently listening to stuff from the past, and find myself enjoying things that I probably didn’t like, or didn’t really get into before. Sometimes, you just want a bunch of feel-good stuff, and hits from the past can definitely deliver that, when needed.

As it goes, I have been compiling a playlist of a bunch of hits from all genres and decades, and have had a lot of fun both making the list, and listening to it. As such I thought, why not share it? I have also shifted dramatically to using Spotify almost exclusively for music, other than my physical LP records and record player, so that’s where the playlist lives. Check it out, and I hope you have fun listening as well! Pro-tip: I shuffle when I listen, so it keeps it fresh!

it is what it is, right?

I wish I were more of an “it is what it is” kinda guy, I really do. Perhaps then when patients really try my patience, and upset me, I could tell myself, “self, it is what it is”, and just let it go. But I don’t.

This week has really been trying my patience, because of my patients.

See, I am the nurse practitioner, and they are the patients. When they come to me with problems, I listen to their symptoms (self-reported), assess the situation (make my own observation of symptoms if they are present), and based on my education, guidelines, and any other information that I need to access in order to come up with a plan of care, I make a diagnosis, and come up with said plan of care. At that time, it is the time where the patient either likes what I have to say, and agrees to do it, or it can go another way entirely.

Lately, it’s been a little more of the latter, and it’s wearing me down.

See, I am invested in this job. I actually care what happens to the patients, and I want to make sure that I am always operating under the healthcare tenets of beneficence and non-maleficence; which simply means that you do no harm, and you always seek to do the best for the patient that you can. Hence, again, why I use my education, knowledge, and guidelines to guide my practice; whether the patient agrees or not.

Now I get it, you can google anything. ANYTHING. And you can find a ton of information out about just about anything as well. BUT, I challenge anyone that questions why I decided to go one way versus another in my decision to treat (or not); where did you find that info? How did you know how to sift between accurate and often times, mostly wild conjecture? How did you know and when did you learn how to interpret labs, symptoms, multiple medical conditions (not to mention how they interact with all of the other intricacies of other bodily systems), and how to pick and choose between hundreds of different solutions, medications, and remedies to come up with the best solution for yourself? Unless you’ve gone through school for it, you are probably operating under the assumption of what someone else has said, and there is no factual evidence behind it; that is, unless you know where to find the correct remedies and solutions.

This is where the frustrating part starts.

I say, based on what you have told me, and my assessment, we are going to do X.

They say, “well I read online that you need to do X”.

I disagree, because this is not the truth. I assure them that I am using factual, evidence-based practice to guide my decisions, which I even offer to get a second of, by asking my colleagues.

Still, I am often met with eye rolling, and being told that they “know their body”, and demanding certain treatments, which can actually do more harm than good. Worse still are those that have series health conditions and don’t seem to heed my warnings about medication compliance, and put themselves at risk for further harm daily.

It really wears you out when you are not an “it is what it is” kinda guy like me; and because of that, I need to rant sometimes, and that is what this is. Maybe I’ll get better at letting it roll off with years of practice; I certainly hope that I do. I wish I could be a little less stressed about the minutiae of it all, and realize that, yes, when it comes to many patients, it truly is what it is, and I have to just let go, and realize that all I can do is attempt to lead them in the right direction; despite the fact that they have the car in reverse and are slamming on the gas at the same time. I just need to focus on the realization that I am not in the car, and whatever happens really is, ultimately up to them.

it’s the little things that kill


On Bush’s Little Things, which hails from their debut album Sixteen Stone (which came out when I was in high school… many mooons ago!), Gavin Rossdale sings, “it’s the little things that kill, tearing at my brain[s] again”. Sometimes, I feel like that song lyric really applies to me, because I do just that more often than I would like; I tend to let the little things get to me, and tear at my brain, bringing me down.

I think I am a pretty easy-going person for the most part, but there are a lot of times when it’s the little things that kill, and get me worked up, and it’s hard to come back down. This occus in more aspects of my life than I would like, but I’ve always been like this, for as long as I can recall.

Today, on my mind, I specifically refer to work for instance; when I am seeing a patient who has (from my perspective) a lack of a discernible stake in their own health care, it really bothers me. It always did when I was a nurse, and it continues to do so now that I am a nurse practitioner. It frustrates me when patients with serious medical conditions have a seemingly lackadaisical attitude about compliance and management of their illness. Sure, I get it, life happens, and I get that you are “busy and cannot come in so often”, but you have a serious chronic condition that if left unchecked, can literally be the death of you. Surely that responsibility is impressed upon most, right? I like to think that it is, but there are many patients that don’t seem bothered by the fact that they ran out of medication weeks ago, and never thought to call the office and see if we could help them in any way. Perhaps it is, in some part, a coping mechanism, fear, or simply ignorance, but when it is a patient that I have seen multiple times, it really tears at my brain how they just don’t seem to have a care in the world, and this “little thing” doesn’t seem like anything important to them. Then, when I am seeing them for their appointment, I get frustrated, and start lecturing them about possible side effects, complications, and all of that, and they just look at me like I’m being mean to them. Then, I get more frustrated. I get that old adage of you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink; but that means being really angry at the horse sometimes.

I know it is my job to educate, and I have learned in the past year of providing care for multiple patients daily, that I will, and continue to, encounter tons of patients that have real medical issues that they don’t want to, or refuse to take ownership of, and deal with, but it really bugs me, because I sincerely want the best for every patient I care for, and their lack of ownership and action on their own behalf stands in the way of that many, many times.

It continues to frustrate me, and while these are little things, and should be more of slight annoyances and things I should just let go, sometimes, I really brings me down, and can make my day less than a happy one. I hope that through my career I learn how to better walk the line between over-caring and complete ambivalence, because the gray area between the two can make even the most compassionate and patient person very frustrated to say the least. Anyone else work in health care feel this same way? I’d be surprised if I’m the only one, because this job can be very trying at times.

Here’s to going forward and trying to not let the little things kill; and hopefully not ruin my day, either.

smashing pumpkins; a revived interest

So after last week’s random check-in blog post, I feel like I have been somewhat reconnected, so to speak, and kind of want to keep the momentum going, if possible. I do think that a large part of that, interestingly, was due to seeing Smashing Pumpkins last weekend in Duluth. It was the Shiny and Oh So Bright tour, which was touted as an almost-greatest hits tour, where they got (most) of the original band back together, and played only stuff from their first 5 albums, spanning from Gish through Machina/The Machines of God.

I had read that ticket sales were lackluster for the tour, but teenage me wanted to go for nostalgia’s sake, and I am so glad that I did; the night was fantastic, and they played hit after hit and fantastic deep album cuts (including my favorite song from Siamese Dream!) for a solid 3 hours! Any fan of their work during that time would have had a blast; which is exactly what I did. All in all, I am so glad that I went, because the concert was amazing; and as I said, teenage me would have been super pumped about that experience, and would have been really happy that I decided to go. Sound-wise, they sounded amazing, and considering that a lot of that material is between 18-27 years old (!!!), it was impressive that the magic was, and is still there.

What I didn’t really expect, however, was that the nostalgia effect turned into a renewed interest and exploration of their newer work, which I honestly overlooked prior to now; which includes pretty much anything after Mellon Collie, other than a few singles here and there. For whatever reason, I kind of snoozed on the band after Mellon Collie; perhaps like most other fans of the hardcore alternative style they flexed prior to Adore, due to the large departure of that album. That being said, listening to it now, I don’t see why I didn’t like it more at the time; it, and their other albums, are all quite good, and are through-and-through Smashing Pumpkins at the core. I do have to venture a guess that part of the blame comes from this coming around a time of much change in my life; I was in college, and a lot was going on with me, and my music tastes were changing wildly at the time. Looking, and listening back, I can hear that most of their work has been pretty consistent (albeit different and evolving), and quite good since their inception, and this time I am spending listening to the “older stuff” has been fun, because I have been reconnecting with a band that I have always loved for as long as I remember liking music.

I do know that some of my issues with the band were based on line up changes, and drug use (which lead to the death of one of the touring members at one time), which can explain why I overlooked some of their work, but that is definitely in the past now. I do remember really liking Zeitgeist when it came out, so it is clear that I have always been willing to give them and their newer work a chance, but I just hadn’t connected like the way I have this past week following that show. I have always held Siamese Dream to such an unattainable standard, that it is no wonder that I have felt so lukewarm about their other albums; which is a shame, because I have been the cause of myself missing out on some pretty awesome music. Additionally, it goes to show that a good concert can really sell a band, past, present, and hopefully future. I have been getting some of the older stuff on vinyl, and I would like to see a release of Machina/The Machines of God (and it’s follow up), as well as Zeitgeist on vinyl as well, because as much of a fan as I was before, I am even more so now. Now, to get the vinyl that is available, and complete my album collection!

time and change

So wow, I realize now that things are left a little, well, under-attentive in this realm of my life these days. I rarely read blogs anymore, mostly because of work and life stress, and honestly, the use of facebook and instagram make everything much more single serve, and have changed the way we interact with people into a predominately swipe and like, and scroll-through-life existence; all of which I am guilty of over-utilizing. That being said, overall things are pretty good, I have a good job that I actually life (shock and awe!), I have a husband that I love, and three wonderful dogs that get away with far too much mischief. I spend time with friends regularly, and despite the lack of reporting about these good things, I can’t complain about too much. I do have a bit more anxiety that I would prefer about life, but I assume worrying can be healthy as well, as it does a good job of keeping me from being too carefree.

I do wish that I participated in more things that I enjoy (like this blog) more regularly, because I remember when I used to get more out of it. However, due to time and change, things often fall to wayside, and become burdensome or tedious, which is unfortunate, because they still bring some joy. I would sit here and say that I am going to try harder to blog more consistently, but honestly, I doubt I will, and even if I do, I don’t even know if people really still read these things. Perhaps I should just post this on instagram? HA! Either way, I know that time and change have affected many things in my life, and while I am marching on to 40 in a few weeks (!!!), I guess a little self-reflection here and there is warranted, and likely appropriate, don’t you think?

Regardless, I haven’t forgotten about my own little piece of the internet, and I will be occasionally dusting it off and making sure that it isn’t buried in the back of a drawer somewhere, because it does still matter to me; even if it isn’t on the front burner anymore due to life and stress. Who knows, maybe I’ll blog more about work and my crazy patient interactions; being a nurse practitioner can be quite interesting… Either way, consider this a long-winded checking-in of sorts, and til the next time… I’m still here!