Do you ever have those times in your life where you want to run as far and as fast as you can away from anything, and just be alone?
I am having one of those times right now. I feel almost like I need a vacation from just being me; or from everything for that matter. I love James, my friends, and everyone around me, but I feel completely and utterly overwhelmed; and this isn’t about them… it’s about me.
Part of my stress is that school is proving to be as difficult as I feared, and the stress has taken me to a place I don’t like to be. I hope that next semester is better, because there is no going back from here. If I don’t move forward with the “next phase” of my life, I don’t know what will happen.
I know that this will pass, as it always does, but damn, it fucking hurts when you are in it, you know? If you don’t, good for you.
It would really do me some good to just get some time to myself, and the bad thing is, I don’t see that happening any time soon. Sorry to post such a depressing sentiment, but that’s where I am right now. I hope everyone else, at least, is doing better that I, and even more, I hope that I am doing better very, very soon myself.
Duane,
You’ve been a good ally on this, and I think it’s important we continue to talk about Makwan Moloudzadeh, the gay Iranian facing execution. Fortunately, scores of bloggers are now publicizing the story (although still nothing from the HRC):
http://atlmalcontent.typepad.com/atlmalcontent/2007/11/his-name-is-mak.html
There’s a now a petition online. Let’s encourage as many people as we can to sign it:
http://www.petitiononline.com/everymak/
Thx.
I don’t understand why you’re unable to get time alone.
Dear everyone(including James),
I love you, but I need some time alone.
Love,
Duane
see.. .done.
atlmalcontent, agreed. I will post about it again tomorrow.
Duane,
i know exactly what you are talking about as I find myself having the same feelings from time to time (have actually been having it recently). I wish I knew what to say to make you feel better, but I know it is something that you will have to come to terms with in your own time and your own way. Maybe you should talk to James about a little time to yourself this weekend. I find that some time by myself always helps me out. I do not want someone asking me how I am or trying to help me feel better when I am in that “mode” and I usually end up hurting someone’s feelings (not intentionally mind you). I hope things get better!!!!
You’ve taken on a lot so it’s understandable. I’m sure you’ll be back to your old self soon enough.
You have Monday off don’t ya?? Ask for time to yourself – we all go through this – it gives you time to grow and time to look inside – time to reflect and time to dream. I’ve been in a funk myself – looking back on life – feeling the need to connect with people I’ve left behind and just having me time. It’s like spinning out of control and needing to slow down. Love ya!! Let me know if I can help!
Duane- believe me, I KNOW how you feel. If being by yourself is a way of recentering yourself and recharging your batteries, then by all means, DO IT!! You’re entering a profession where a high percentage of people burn out simply because they don’t schedule enough “me time” in their lives. You can’t begin to learn to take care of others until you learn to take care of yourself. Here’s wishing you a nice dose of Duane time!
I think most people can relate, I know I can. I’m sure your loved ones would understand if you just asked for a little space to collect yourself.
And if you need anything, you know where I’m at.
I love you!!!
Life was so uncomplicated amd we never knew it until now. With 2 kids,a demanding job, school and a husband (oh and a 125lb dog) time for just me is non-existant. But I know that these years will go by fast and then there will be something else. Take a day, hide and do nothing. That is my plan for some well deserved comp time at work.
Email me at work
vanessazitzmann@msnhealth.com
I need pick me ups too.