an end to the pussy

This pussy’s gotta go. So, remember when I posted the oh so sad pictures of Sydney from a few days ago with the cone on his head? Well, I think that I discovered what happened to his ear. Last night, I came in from work, and I let him out so he could do his business. Well, about 30 seconds after he got through the dog door, I heard the loudest and most horrifying yelping coming from outside; it was Sydney. I freaked and ran outside, just in time to see him standing under the deck screaming for his life as a black cat ran out from under the deck. I chased the cat away, and went back to console the terrified little boy. Sydney not only pissed all over himself he was so scared, he literally trembled for about 30 minutes after, and wouldn’t go back outside alone. Upon further inspection, I saw that the cat took a chuck out of his side, but luckily, it wasn’t bad enough to warrant stitches. Oh hell no. That pussy is as good as dead.

Now, we have had problems with cats in the past, and I had a hard time coming to terms with sending a cat to their death at the “kill immediately” Dekalb Animal Services center. But not this time. That cat (and any other neighborhood pussy I can catch) is now going the way of the dodo. Now, before you try and talk me out of this decision, keep in mind, that this cat climbed our 8 foot fence to get inside our back yard, in order to attack my dog; twice. Well, not on my watch. Now that I know that there is a ravenous pussy out there trying to hurt my Syd (and has succeeded twice), the conscience that I had about killing cats is over. It is survival of the fittest; and I have a cage and Dekalb Animal Services on my side, pussy. Watch out puss, because it is ON.

37 Responses to “an end to the pussy”


  1. Gravatar Icon 1 Mark Jun 28th, 2006 at 12:05 pm

    I am not a huge cat lover but I must admit I feel sorry for that “Pussy.” Protect your baby Duane.

    Last night I saw a show you must check out. “Kyle xy” It comes on Mondays at 8pm.

    ~ Mark

  2. Gravatar Icon 2 duane Jun 28th, 2006 at 12:07 pm

    Thanks Mark! You know, I tried to watch some of that show the other night, and it bored the hell out of me. Oh well, thanks for the suggestion though!

  3. Gravatar Icon 3 PJS Jun 28th, 2006 at 12:36 pm

    Cats are horrible, hateful creatures. Why anyone keeps them as pets is beyond me. I mean have these people SEEN dogs??? Dogs are mankind’s perfect companion! Especially beagles. But I digress…

  4. Gravatar Icon 4 mingaling Jun 28th, 2006 at 12:52 pm

    Oh no! I’m so sad at the thought of poor little Sydney being attacked :(

  5. Gravatar Icon 5 Robin Jun 28th, 2006 at 1:03 pm

    Poor pussy. this is a reason why I’m afraid to let them outdoors.

  6. Gravatar Icon 6 bobafred Jun 28th, 2006 at 1:08 pm

    Sydney is the pussy here. Maybe it’s because you gave him a girl name??

    But, I’m allergic to cats, so I support your decision.

  7. Gravatar Icon 7 dpb Jun 28th, 2006 at 1:10 pm

    I’m not going to try and change your mind. Can I watch/help during the execution? Rock on!

  8. Gravatar Icon 8 Alex Vernon Jun 28th, 2006 at 1:20 pm

    I’ll bring my dog over, he’ll take care of it.

  9. Gravatar Icon 9 Shan! Jun 28th, 2006 at 1:55 pm

    If people can’t keep their animals under control then do what you need to do.

  10. Gravatar Icon 10 jeff Jun 28th, 2006 at 2:10 pm

    PJS is TRYING to be my malcontent (he’s cruising for a bruising). Audrey ADORES him, sort of.

    I have wild cats roaming around right now and my yard is littered with dead lizards and exploded birds. I feel bad about their situation but I don’t encourage them or feed them. In the desert nature takes care of itself, sort of.

  11. Gravatar Icon 11 gary Jun 28th, 2006 at 2:23 pm

    Careful Duane…This sounds like a street-smart, harden piece of pussy your baby is being intimidated by.

    That kinda pussy can be tough and scrappy.

    Watch yourself and show that pussy who is pimpin’ who!

  12. Gravatar Icon 12 Vince Jun 28th, 2006 at 2:55 pm

    Pussy is evil. Plain and simple.

  13. Gravatar Icon 13 cjg Jun 28th, 2006 at 3:38 pm

    watch out for strange black pussy… i carried one away in a humane trap once — across 3 major highways & a river to set it free some 5 miles from home…

    36 hours later, it was back on the convertible roof under the carport.. 2nd time i trapped it, animal control came & picked up the cage… it came back empty & i didn’t ask any questions

    no strange black pussy crawling on my car anymore…

    a dog is infinitely more worthy of protection than a macho-man machine… go get’em dm

  14. Gravatar Icon 14 Sean Jun 28th, 2006 at 5:56 pm

    As a huge cat lover (lover of most animals, actually) I firmly believe in the “live and let live” rule…that is, until the fucker wanders onto MY turf and then it’s WAR!!! Don’t feel guilty about doing what you need to do. Sydney should be able to go about his “business” without fear of imminent attack. The damn cat had its death warrant signed the second it climbed your fence.

  15. Gravatar Icon 15 gary Jun 28th, 2006 at 5:58 pm

    OMG Vince!!!

    All Pussy is evil. I laughed so hard.

  16. Gravatar Icon 16 chutney Jun 28th, 2006 at 6:14 pm

    Dribble some man piss around the perimeter of your yard. Kitty will stay away.

  17. Gravatar Icon 17 Josh Jun 28th, 2006 at 6:23 pm

    Forget the “man piss” and just do away with the beast. Cats are evil and the only thing protecting us from them is their size. If cats were as big as medium sized dogs they would hunt and eat us.

    Any animal that waits under the couch, waits for you to pass, and then takes a hunk out of your leg with a swipe of its paw is no friend of mine.

    EVIL PUSSY!!!

  18. Gravatar Icon 18 ATLmalcontent Jun 28th, 2006 at 7:00 pm

    Wouldn’t you know I’m a cat person? I mean no malice to your dog, but if I dare see you harm a cat I will come down on you with the hammer of the gods. And, if need be, I’ll use personal attacks (kinda, sorta, kidding

  19. Gravatar Icon 19 Joe Jun 28th, 2006 at 7:05 pm

    Have you tried to toughen up your dog? I mean he does look like he would be picked on. Maybe a studded collar or a little leather jacket for him? A bark enhancer so he doesn’t sound so nelly? What about vampire teeth?

  20. Gravatar Icon 20 Jay Jun 28th, 2006 at 7:51 pm

    I don’t understand cats and people who keep them as pets. They are disgusting filthy predators. They go out, chew and lick dead carcasses, kill birds and anything else and lick their intestines, then crawl through dumpsters licking the rotting food out of used cans, then they come back and rub their faces all over their owner’s faces and bodies and the owners just eat it up, “Isn’t he so cuuute.” Disgusting. Kill the thing. It’s like killing a cockroach.

  21. Gravatar Icon 21 Jay Jun 28th, 2006 at 7:54 pm

    Or if can’t that that mean, get a trap, then take it to the pound and in three days, they’ll do the dirty work for ya.

  22. Gravatar Icon 22 Jay Jun 28th, 2006 at 7:55 pm

    err Or if you can’t be that mean…. Sheesh I type better on drugs then off them.

  23. Gravatar Icon 23 ted Jun 28th, 2006 at 7:58 pm

    Uh, Jay, have you ever seen a dog roll around in its own shit, eat dead birds, and lick its own asshole? Dogs are predators, too, and dogs are dirtier than cats–they don’t get clean unless you do it for them. Sydney needs to take some boxing lessons. Butch him up. Cats don’t attack anything unless it shows fear.

  24. Gravatar Icon 24 Simon Jun 28th, 2006 at 8:19 pm

    This has really got me pissed off. I value the life of any cat over most of the idiots who make these hateful comments here. Funny, no cat lover I know would suggest that a dog be harmed, but dog people think it quite acceptable to destroy any feline that gets in their way. Humans are the only evil animal. Duane, if you do succeed in catching the offending cat there are alternatives to taking it to DeKalb Animal Services: there are several no-kill shelters such as the Atlanta Humane Society. Do the right thing. I know you’re not a brute, really.

  25. Gravatar Icon 25 bobafred Jun 28th, 2006 at 11:06 pm

    I hate dogs and cats. Go evil humans!

  26. Gravatar Icon 26 Ted Jun 29th, 2006 at 3:30 am

    I love cats and find it terribly sad that your pooch gets beat up by a poor little pussy cat. lol. it’s actually kinda funny. :-D

  27. Gravatar Icon 27 jeff Jun 29th, 2006 at 5:26 am

    Jay, Audrey says you can’t come over anymore, EVER. I’m sorry but that’s the way she feels (EVER!!!).

    Duane, seriously get that cat out of your area. Feral cats like that will attack anything they think they can out of hunger. You don’t want Sydney ending up as cat food it’s undignified.

  28. Gravatar Icon 28 Josh Jun 29th, 2006 at 10:07 am

    Cats don’t attack anything unless it shows fear.

    I call BULLSHIT!! cats attack anything and everything that they think they can get away with.

    Truthfully, I think that both Cats and Dogs suck total ass. I think it is completely inhumane to keep pets at all. Too many of them sit at home all day, with no companionship besides the freaking airconditioner and the occasional bird at the window. Animals are not ours to hold hostage just so that we can be entertained or kept from being lonley.

  29. Gravatar Icon 29 Laura Jun 29th, 2006 at 10:34 am

    Josh, when did you join PETA?

    Duane, it’s an animal. Do what you think is best.

    Will you be around on Friday/Saturday?

  30. Gravatar Icon 30 Nikki Jun 30th, 2006 at 4:55 pm

    Well, as you said at trivia, Syd weighs less than either of my cats, and given that cats have claws, pound for pound, the cat has an advantage. The cat in this situation is also conditioned to beat the shit out of anything that gets too close . . . . so it may be more humane to euthanize the animal. Older animals have a hard time getting adopted and if it’s not been socialized at all, it will be 100% more difficult to place. Anyway, you do what you have to do. I would go (and have gone) ballistic about people’s dogs being loose and terrorizing my cats. You’re completely within your rights.

  31. Gravatar Icon 31 Daniel Jun 30th, 2006 at 9:49 pm

    Personall I think cats suck. A former cat owner as a child, still hate the damn things. Duane if you need two dogs that are willing to chase, hunt, and possibly mangle a cat, I have two that are in desperate need of some time outta the house. Just let me know. I kid. But seriously if you want them just ask.

  32. Gravatar Icon 32 chase Jul 5th, 2006 at 7:35 pm

    I feel the same protective rage if there’s any threat to my pets, & I understand the feeling of “I’ll do anything to protect them.” I’m not saying your feelings are out of line at ALL.

    However, the comments have turned into a strange crowd-rage thing. I LOVE your blog, but this post as an entirety (which means including the “attaboys” & fueling the anger) bothers me. It’s like when people cheer on a fight. I think this will bring on a ton of angry comments, & to that I say the last thing I mean is any disrespect or harm. I’m just asking for an open mind.

    The place I’m coming from is the place of which we have a lot in common. It’s the same reason I’m a liberal, anti-war, yada yada. I don’t think violence is ever the right answer for violence.

    But they aren’t just words. It sounds like you have a trap. If you do, please consider me instead of animal control. I’ll give you my cell #, & you can call me & I’ll be there within 30 minutes to take the cat. You’ll never see him/her again, & your dog won’t ever be attacked again. Come on, Duane… that cat’s death doesn’t have to be the answer. The only thing it’ll serve is vengance. Will you let me take the cat away?

  33. Gravatar Icon 33 Chad Jul 6th, 2006 at 8:38 am

    “I don’t understand cats and people who keep them as pets. They are disgusting filthy predators. They go out, chew and lick dead carcasses, kill birds and anything else and lick their intestines, then crawl through dumpsters licking the rotting food out of used cans, then they come back and rub their faces all over their owner’s faces and bodies and the owners just eat it up, “Isn’t he so cuuute.”"

    Are you kidding me? Dogs will eat their own or other dog’s shit if they can. Not only that, they lick their genitalia all day and most often smell like fritos if not bathed often. Then they come home and lick your face all day and you dog owners eat that crap up like it’s the best thing in the world. Blech to dog owners too.

  34. Gravatar Icon 34 duane Jul 6th, 2006 at 10:12 am

    I know that there are a few of you that don’t want the cat harmed, and trust me, I don’t want to harm it either, but the cat is 99% likely feral, and you CANNOT adopt out feral cats. No kill shelters will not even take them for that reason. As of right now, this is our only option, so I have no choice but to proceed. We haven’t seen the cat in a week or so, so hopefully, she has moved on. But, I am still going to get the trap, just in case she hasn’t. Sorry folks.

  35. Gravatar Icon 35 chase Jul 7th, 2006 at 12:29 pm

    I definitely hope the cat has moved on: I know how thrilled you would be. And your puppy as well. But you’re wrong: you CAN adopt feral cats. I’ve worked with them before, & I’ve offered to take this one. So that does make other options you have. If you sincerely don’t want the cat harmed & s/he comes back, you have a 2nd option & that’s to call me.

    BTW, if you buy the trap & months go by with no signs of the cat, there are some local groups who work with feral cats that accept (humane) traps as donations: http://www.harveyfoundation.qpg.com (in Hiram), & in the ATL - http://www.atlantaanimalalliance.com, http://www.cleverkitty.com/catlanta.htm, & http://atlantaanimalalliance.com/aaa/index.html. And I’d always take it too, since I don’t have one of my own.

    Here are some good trapping instructions, because it’s trickier to catch them than you’d think: http://www.spotsociety.org/trapmain.htm.

    Sorry to be so pushy, but please give me some slack: this is my life-work.

  36. Gravatar Icon 36 duane Jul 8th, 2006 at 1:04 pm

    Chase, I am going to do everything in my power to get you the cat. Cross my heart. Thanks for taking it in advance!! A pussy reprieve people!

  37. Gravatar Icon 37 duane Sep 14th, 2006 at 2:04 pm

    Hey spambots! Suck on this! AND END TO THE COMMENTS MOTHERFUCKERS!

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