normally, I wouldn’t, but…

I delete spam 99% of the time. Hell, if I don’t recognize the email or the name, I delete it immediately (so sorry if you sent me a message with HI or whatever in the subject line and I never emailed you back… chances are, I deleted it). But one that just came (HA!) through my inbox was just too good not to check out. The subject line was:

Hi, opium poisoning

Now, that peaked my interest. First of all, who in their right mind would type that out, and then send it, in order to get me to buy a product or check out a website (well, other than a reputable opium dealer)? Why Joseph Hilario, that’s who!! Now seriously, after seeing this “catchy” title, I think to myself, “self, what is in this message? Will it hold the key to larger genitals or miracle weight loss regimens? Will I finally be able to cure that nasty ED?”. Well, none of the above today, kids, instead, I found this, which actually made me snort I laughed so hard:

Within the adlt industry, it’s no secret porn stars use supplements to help them cum more.
Along with numerous stars that use our product, thousands of men
have increased their sperm volume with our formula. If you’ve ever
wanted to cum like a porn star, SPUR-M will get you there.
(We are endorsed by DavyD, renowned in the porn industry
for the amount he ejaculates! this is all thanks to SPUR-M)SPUR-M has an impressive history.

Wow. I can’t even begin to express the true emotions that I feel when I read this. I mean, I have never even heard of a guy that wants to cum more. Maybe if he did, then his porn name could be like Dick Geyser or something clever like that; you know, a play on the whole “Old Faithful” stream of cum, right? I can honestly say, this Joseph Hilario hasn’t managed to convince me that I need to cum more, but he has convinced me to check out more spam emails; perhaps their is something interesting in them after all.

9 Responses to “normally, I wouldn’t, but…”


  1. Gravatar Icon 1 Amber May 31st, 2006 at 11:41 am

    But Duane! SPUR-M has an impressive history! Isn’t that enough for you??

  2. Gravatar Icon 2 duane May 31st, 2006 at 12:05 pm

    Amber, to be honest, it almost is.

  3. Gravatar Icon 3 dpb May 31st, 2006 at 12:32 pm

    Love the name, SPUR-M, and even though you may find it hard to believe, DavyD is not I.

  4. Gravatar Icon 4 Sean May 31st, 2006 at 1:31 pm

    I hope you didn’t delete the e-mail I sent you the other day by accident. There was some good info in it.

  5. Gravatar Icon 5 Robguy May 31st, 2006 at 2:58 pm

    That’s very interesting, all the porn star that have made recommendations to me say Jaculex. But to me, ejaculating more just means more to clean up. Good sex may be messy, but really…

  6. Gravatar Icon 6 docjohnboy May 31st, 2006 at 3:20 pm

    That’s probably what happened to the email with my phone number.

  7. Gravatar Icon 7 dpb May 31st, 2006 at 3:28 pm

    either that, or somehow your number got associated with all the phone sex lines ;-)

  8. Gravatar Icon 8 Katie May 31st, 2006 at 4:00 pm

    Wow! That is a lot more interesting than the spam that I get.

  9. Gravatar Icon 9 Simon Jun 1st, 2006 at 4:12 am

    Duane, for all the spermily-challenged among us, you’re going to have to try it and let us know if it works.

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