For some reason that I cannot identify, I am feeling kind of down today, even though it is payday. I tend to do this every once and I while; fill myself with doubt and anxiety about shit I cannot control (i.e., job, money, etc.), and accidentally downplay and or ignore all the good things in my life (i.e., everything else). To top it all off, when I was paying my bills on Bank of America’s website (yay! paying bills is super-fun), I saw this link that calculates what it would take for you to retire a millionaire; and, being a glutton for punishment, I clicked it. And this is what it said:
If you invest $5,000 now and $350 monthly at 6.00%, you’ll be a millionaire in 59 years at age 86. (86? SHIT! Just in time to replenish my supply of Depends)
To be a millionaire at age 65 (this is a little more reasonable, maybe I will be able to enjoy 5 years of non-Alzheimer’s filled fun), you’ll need to:
Increase the amount you invest now to $140,162 , or
Increase your monthly investment to $923 , or
Achieve a rate of return of 11.42%.
When adjusted for inflation, $1 million in 59 years would be equivalent to $178,970 today.
OH HAPPY DAY!!! I think the part that is the most shocking about that whole thing, is the statement that, when adjusted for inflation, $1 million dollars in 35 or so years will only be worth about what $179k is worth now! FUCK!! That means that I will definitely be living off of the state, who won’t with those figures, right (here’s hoping we can… yikes!)?
Oh well, that definitely isn’t making me feel any better about that shit I cannot control; BUT the mini shopping spree I did during lunch certainly is. Ah, nothing like a little retail therapy to dull the pain, and make you forget how much money you DON’T have. Welcome to America folks!!!
I seriously do feel better now… I will probably need to spend some money after work to increase that good feeling. And drink some beer. Such a good friend, beer is. Thank God is it Friday. And, the best part about this weekend, is that it is a three-day one!!! Have a great Columbus day weekend folks! Take a day and celebrate the man that “discovered” America; or, as I like to think of it, the man who raped, pillaged, stole, cheated, and exploited a nation of people that could quite possibly be traced to the beginning of the human species!! But who am I to complain, I do get the day off, at least.
I wish it was payday for me
Robin, if it makes you feel any better, it was today, but the money is almost all gone!! YAY BILLS!!! WHOO HOOO!!!!!
You get a day off for Columbus Day, color me jealous!
I am so glad I don’t use Bank of America, I think I would literally be crying if I saw what I needed to put away each month! Enjoy the weekend.
That is so depressing. I just followed the link too and was told I’d be a millionaire by age 82, in 50 years. Yeah, you know what, by 82, I plan to be *cutting back* on working for income, not still doing what I’m doing to continue my paltry contributions to some savings vehicle. Thanks for ruining my day there, Duane.
I’ve been down this week too. So much so I took the day off - because we don’t get Monday off - and I spent the day thinking about winning the lottery tonight. I bought a ticket and I will enjoy a beer in your honor tonight as I watch to see if we win and become rich or if it’s just another Friday night.
Life is too short to worry about the future. Live for the moment. Enjoy the shopping sprees of life and remember - you can’t take it with you when you die and since we don’t have any rights in the US - spend like hell since we really don’t have a spouse to leave the bills to.
You will always have a rocking chair on my front porch even if you don’t have a dollar to your name. We can eat spaghetti and drink beer everyday!!
Cheer - up - I just know we will win the lottery. If we don’t - file for bankruptcy before the laws change and enjoy life!!
Here’s to you - bottoms up!!
Well, when you put it like that, Wendy…
And Dennis!, sorry to ruin your day… at least it will get bett… oh wait, nevermind.
Sounds like someone needs a pumpkin spice cupcake with nutmeg buttercream frosting. I’ve already figured out that I’m screwed for retirement so I am also totally counting on the lottery.
Cheer up pumpkin. Money don’t buy happiness, just Prada shoes… oh wait, there goes that theory.
Not having money is a bitch, I’ve worked that look more than a few times and it can be a real downer.
Count your blessing, maybe that’ll work.
Young? Check.
Healthy? Check.
Hella cute? Check.
Lovely boyfriend? Check.
Smarts? Check.
Need I go on…
Have a great weekend.
Thanks Andrew, you are super sweet! And you are right… I even mentioned it in the post, for some reason, i am always focusing on the negative; perhaps that is why I think that I have some generalized anxiety, I can’t seem to get it out of my mind, even though I have so many wonderful things around me.
And now, with that, i am going to go out and have a fabulous night and get shit faced (not too shit faced… like last weekend… see previous post UGH!), and forget all about this; until tomorrow. =o) Thanks everyone for the sweetness!!!
And Jeff, you better deliver those cup cakes. If you are ever in ATL, we will go for something better… Carrot cake cheesecake… my favorite. I think that I gained a pound just typing that.
Gotta love bills.